Let Yourself Fall

On Overcoming Fear, Embracing Healing, and Letting Go of Past Failures

Feb 25, 2024

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(Proverbs 16:24)

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Earlier this week, I decided to do something I hadn't done in years: go skating.

As I laced up the roller skates, I kept repeating, "I haven't done this in years,"
and jokingly said to myself, "Don't laugh if I fall," wondering what I had gotten myself into.

Gripping the safety rail, I cautiously skated halfway around the rink. Overwhelmed and fearful among the carefree skaters, I reluctantly took a seat by the wall, consumed by self-doubt, surrounded by people skating freely.

I found myself paralyzed by fear, so I reluctantly took the dreaded seat along the wall as I reminded myself, "I still have to skate to get back."

Watching others twirl with I debated whether to remove my skates and face the walk of shame.

Finally, I mustered the courage to get up and held Jay's hand as we made our way around. He tried to encourage me to skate alone by letting go, but I quickly held on to his hand.

Midway around the rink, I felt ready to go on my own. Skating straight was easy, but turning was incredibly challenging because I had to surrender and lean my body into it wholly.

As I stumbled for the first time, I felt my hip stiffen and feared falling, so I went to the rail.

"What's wrong?" Jay questioned. "My hip hurts," I replied.
While holding onto the rail, so many thoughts came to mind.

What if my hip gives out and I fall? Am I going to need to go back to physical therapy?
Are these strangers going to laugh at me?

At times, fear of falling holds us back from soaring freely.
Past failures can anchor us to what's safe, fearing the unknown.
The pain of life can trap us in stillness, avoiding further hurt.

At times, fear of falling holds us back from soaring freely.
Past failures can anchor us to what's safe,
fearing the unknown.
The pain of life can trap us in stillness, avoiding further hurt.

But imagine if, for a moment, we didn't fear falling, hurting, or losing,
and allowed ourselves to move with ease.

What if we let our guard down and let our protective walls melt away?

Full disclosure, I am going through a tough season in my life, navigating childhood trauma, grief, and heartbreak. In this challenging time, here are
Three Reminders That Keep Me Going:

You don't have to navigate life alone.
We were not meant to journey through life in isolation. While it is our responsibility to pursue healing, we can seek out a supportive community.
There are individuals who are willing to offer solace during our moments of anguish. You do not have to confront life's hardships by yourself.
Allow yourself to be embraced and supported. Let yourself be held.
Falling doesn't equate to failing.
Whether the stumble was caused by your misstep or the actions of others, it does not define you as a failure. Whether you opt to persevere or take a step back, it does not mark you as a failure. At times, life may knock us off balance, but that does not signify the conclusion of our journey. Let yourself fall.
So what if they laugh?
Just as we are responsible for our own healing, others are responsible for theirs. Some may mock our setbacks, but I choose to believe that those around us are willing to extend a helping hand. Some may be incapable of standing alongside us during our healing process, because they aren’t ready to receive healing for themselves. And that's alright—keep moving forward regardless. Let yourself heal.

On your most challenging days, may you remember that you are not alone in navigating life's journey. Falling does not signify failure. Whether met with laughter or support, your healing is your own.

Let’s take a moment to breathe deep and exhale together.
Inhale through the nose, and exhale with a deep sigh.

Listen: A Sunday kinda Tune
Movin On - Jonathan McReynolds, Mali Music

Reflect: Journal Prompts (Feel free to share in Comments)
- Reflect on a time when you felt self-doubt and how you overcame it.
- Have you ever struggled to let go of protective walls or past hurts?
- How do you define failure? Do you believe that falling or stumbling in life equates to failure? Why or why not?